Five tips that helped increase my confidence...
I’ve been thinking a lot about confidence recently. It’s something I’ve always had a problem with throughout my life. People always seem surprised or assumed I never had a problem with confidence as I'm quite chatty and can generally hold my own when needed, but it's taken me a long time to build up to that.
Earlier this year I had a bit of a relapse in confidence so I vowed that I was going to start giving myself some self-care and respect. This is something I’ve been focussed on for the last 12 months and it’s changed my life. Now, don’t get me wrong, I still have days when I go into a bit of a meltdown mode and think “There’s no way you can do this!” e.g CIPR Chartership ;-) but I only allow myself an hour or so to feel like this before I put my superpowers in action.
Everyone has superpowers and they will all be different. For some people it’s going for a run, doing mediation, reading something motivational, painting - it’s basically any activity that gives you strength and helps give you a feeling that you can handle anything. It’s taken me a while to discover mine but I finally have them honed down and I hope a couple work for you.
The warrior pose. When I first read about this in Amy Cuddy’s book I was not convinced. Thought it was a bit nonsensical and fluffy, but boy oh boy it really works. Here’s Amy talking about it in more detail: https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are/up-next?language=en - I often do this pose if I’m about to go into a challenging meeting or onto stage to present!
Building my knowledge. As you’ll know if you’ve been reading my blogs for a while, I’m passionate about CPD and everything it stands for. It’s one of reasons I play such an active part in CIPR. Knowledge and understanding are things that can never be taken away from you. It helps boost your confidence, gives you support when you might face into challenge and helps elevate you into a trusted advisor relationship. It doesn’t have to be anything taxing but make it your mission to learn something new at least once a day.
Power song. I have three songs that help shake me out of my imposter mode, they are: This is me (literally the best song ever), Hero (cheesy it might be but the words are fantastic) and Don’t stop me now (a great feel good song).
Mantra. Some people find this cringe but it’s my superpower so I don’t care - I love a good quote and positive affirmations. It makes such a difference to your day reading something inspirational. I have a photo album full of screen shots of random quotes. My fave one at the moment is “Comfort is the enemy of progress”
Gratitude. No matter how rubbish I’m feeling as soon as I write down three things I’m grateful for my attitude changes dramatically. They don’t need to be big things - I’ve got lists on my phone that say things like “found a parking space right outside work!”, “great team meeting.”
Remember confidence is something that’s within your control. So, I’ll leave you with another one of my cheesy quotes: “Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone at all!"