I received a DM from someone bullied by a toxic boss. Not in an obvious way but subtle aggressions, which is causing them to second guess their value.
It’s now at a stage where their mental and physical health is being poorly impacted. They are at a loss for what to do and are desperately trying to find a new role.
I know some of you will relate, so here are some tips to help protect yourself ????????
1) After every meeting with them, summarise the conversation via email with clear actions you’ll be taking and the next steps – so they can’t accuse you of not delivering something.
2) If you feel safe, speak to someone you trust. You don’t have to raise a formal complaint, but sharing it with someone is better than holding it in.
3) Keep a record of the incidents with data backing it up, including dates and times. You can use this to raise it with them directly or via HR.
4) Remember that their behaviour stems from their insecurities, and it’s rarely anything to do with you. We can’t control how others behave, but we can control how we may react. As hard as it is, keep it strictly professional, deliver against your objectives and stay factual.
5) If the role impacts you to the extent it’s leaving you unwell – you need to go ASAP. Get your exit strategy sorted, and be intentional with your next opportunity.
Ultimately, if you’re a people manager responsible for a team, don’t underestimate your impact on others. I know how tough it can be as a line manager, but if you’re causing mental harm to a colleague/s, then you either need to stop being a people manager or find appropriate coaching/training.
I was bullied in my first job, and I know the impact it can have. But I promise you things will get better.
Originally posted on LinkedIn, Follow me for more curious moments.
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